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Do you long to quieten the chatter in your head, and know peace?


Is your head ever empty of thought, and blissfully quiet? Does it ever allow you to be completely engrossed in this moment – without worry for the next moment or fret for a past one? The typical adult apparently spends the equivalent of 5 years worrying, and that is a long time! Perhaps there is a temporary state that brings you peace. I occasionally have the “state” of migraine to stop me; the painful and disgusting detail of which I will spare you. It makes me stop caring about the whole world outside of the retreat of my bedroom. I become alien to myself: frail, tearful, and self-absorbed. But it so often carries a blessing.

As with everything in my life, I let the lesson reveal itself. This will be the topic for a future post, but I know that all that we go through is for a purpose. I am not fatalistic in that regard, however if one is shrewd it is possible to make life a much more pleasant journey!

This latest migraine lasted 48hrs, and the lesson arrived into the second day. It was that, suddenly, I was aware there were no thoughts in my head. This was a state I had lived in for many years, but had recently lost. It is the state we ideally arrive at once our fearful egos learn to trust in our evolution, and quieten their chatter. For so long I had only responded with thought or action when stimulated. The phone would ring, I’d answer it. An important email would arrive, I’d answer it. Something would need to be arranged so I’d plan it. But NEVER would my mind be full between those moments, it remained gloriously empty, and thus peaceful. It permitted me, thus, to fully enjoy each moment.

Many of you who work in a proper working environment (rather than like myself working from home) could say “well, my mind is like that but the stream of incoming is endless, so there is no peace”. However, there are times available to us all when there could be stillness, but our chattering egos fill it. It may be having fun filling it by having thoughts like “I wonder if he will respond to my Facebook poke!?” or “…and then she will say to me…and then I will say …!” But it is all nervous chatter simply because we become uneasy when silence reigns, because then we may have time to consider our problems, the chips on our shoulders, and bigger issues looming.

As you will read in my “about me” post, I have stepped into a new and professional world since finishing my book. The learning curve has been steep. The stimulation to which I respond has been without cessation. Even my yogic practice or lonely dog walks did not provide entire release. So, it was with huge appreciation that I was hit with that bolt on the second day. Without noticing, my mind had run away with me!

You will find me now dipping into and out of Facebook, Twitter or LinkedIn. I will read the tweets I am meant to. I will make the new friends I am meant to. I will comment, “poke” or “like” you when it truly matters. I am connected afresh to the majesty of a quiet mind that provides my bliss from which I am my most genuine and productive. I trust my purpose of providing insight, and self help via my blogs or book, will be valued as much as I value shutting you all off when I should! Solitary, quiet ME time is essential. Even better if it is spent out in nature. Don’t be afraid of it. Give yourself time to make friends with it. You will find a person you didn’t know within yourself who is strong, fearless, beautiful, capable and surprisingly very, very happy.


The Sex Pendulum

IMG_9151Having today counselled yet another middle-aged victim of childhood sexual abuse, I began thinking. So many people today are worried that our sexual liberation is swinging far too far to the other end of the spectrum – from the sheltered, inhibited or ignorant sexual lives of our parents and ancestors. Almost weekly I could cry upon hearing another tragic tale of sexual abuse that utterly marred a young life and ruined, thereafter, any hope of ‘normal’ adult sensual intimacy, and all of the loving beauty it would contain.

The current swing of that pendulum, towards huge sexual openness and expression, is entirely a good thing. So much damage was done via the perpetuated thoughts that our sensuality and sexuality were wicked – in the days when denial ruled.  As long as the many diverse sexual penchants is between consenting adults there should be a reduction in the extreme frustrations of lives led without such expression. The result should be much less abuse  inflicted on the young and vulnerable.

When that pendulum starts to find balance we will be in a better place. And that can’t help but happen. Having learned that there are many sexual tastes and habits, the next generation will realise it is all still pretty empty, and that something is still missing.  They will go in search of that which makes it all magical. They will have greater acceptance of all we can be as sensual and sexual beings. The task of our children will then be to learn so much more about LOVE, rather than our ancestors who would have needed to have learned about Love AND their sexuality.  By not just paying lipservice to being a parent, or to being a partner – can we help them by our example?  Our existence should be all about offering those we cherish our unconditional love, and teaching our children about such love. But too often we need to slow down and consider – do we do enough of that?

(The “pornification” of our children will be the subject of one of my next blogs.)

Enlightenment and Hope for New Era

I can see that the state of Enlightenment has become many things; all for reason, but not all for good. There can exist a competitive edge to “Awakening” – an “I’m better than you” mentality. It can set us up to chase gurus, or be seduced by the draw of the greater abilities we believe we will acquire. We are capable of doing almost anything to emulate it. And that, too, is for reason. But sadly, because it is held up to be so rare an occurrence, we can lose the joy of the journey for the sake of the goal.

If one still urgently needs something outside of oneself then one has not done enough of healing one’s inner self. Enlightenment is given as a gift for when the work is very much done – once that Physician has healed him/herself. It is, without doubt, an enormous gift which brings with it many new abilities. So, if the foundation is still shaky, and the intention not right, then how could such a gift be given – sensibly?!

Today was, for many, the celebration of the end of an era (21st December), and the celebration of a new and inspiring one. Truth is supposed to be a major element of the next era. My celebratory gift to you is that the longer we go on saying that Enlightenment is SO special, and is just for the very few – then IT WILL BE. What stops us from moving towards the bliss of it is how we have lived our lives. Through my yogic path I learned well, and I learned that Truth is an imperative factor that has been missing in quite a huge way from all of our lives. But we have the conditioned thinking that Truth is terrifying and will only cause problems. It will – until the “how-to-deliver-it” is known and understood.

How can we expect to evolve further if we go on accepting all of the un-truths. As I point out in my book – if we live in utter truth, then we grow to fully respect ourselves, and then we are able to love ourselves, and THEN we get to the point of Deserving a better, and more joyful existence. Un-truths litter our lives, and they littered the lives of our parents and ancestors. They did not hand on to us what they could have. No blame is being levelled; it just was the way it was – for reason.

If there can be complete truth between partners, and within families, then there can be complete trust, and with that comes real and big LOVE. With that complete truth and bigger love we no longer just give lip-service to being a partner, or a parent, we truly step up to that commitment. What doesn’t come with it is the making of our “issues” and damage. And that real, big, un-needy love IS the essence of Enlightenment. With that deep, unconditional love becoming the norm then our suffering through fear, doubt, and hate vanishes. All we would have then to hurt us would be the events of death and loss. All facts of life. All made bearable through the real love of those around us.

Try it out as your new gift to yourself; ‘I will not tell even the smallest lie, nor will I accept any told to me’. Once you start to live in such a way you will find every relationship reaching amazing and beautiful depth – the depth for which we yearn! Each gets stronger and stronger and more loving and supportive. So, forget that chase for Enlightenment. Love the journey with others close to you!

Thank you for reading. I wish you the happiest of Christmases, a very Happy New Year, and a brilliantly joyful and love-full new era!

Inspiration – the way to your truest self and unique gifts

NewForestWelcome to my very first blog – Inspiration.

I know that once one is aligned to one’s purpose in life (or one’s purpose in a moment) then inspiration comes constantly and easily. You will be reading this because inspired thought is different to intellectual thought. Each has its place and purpose. Each kind of “thought” has the potential to unlock something within and to help us evolve. I should, perhaps, explain why I put the quotation marks around the word thought . To my mind, the act of thinking or having thoughts is something that we DO; we have power over creating thoughts and we commonly think of “I” as being the thought-creator. Whereas with inspiration we are not the ones who DO or achieve.

Inspiration is the breathing in – it comes to us not by our own do-ing, but by our quietening so that it is heard. Inspiration then becomes thought. Even more aptly, inspiration is ‘a supernatural, divine influence which qualifies us to communicate divine truth’. This applies to each and every one of us when we are truly on our path permitting our unique gift to shine – be that as artist, scientist, musician, teacher, athlete or writer. It applies once our mind is out of the way. It is the trap of our mind, and our constant thinking, that can drop a veil to hinder our connection to our unique gifts.

Perhaps you have not found your inspiration yet. Don’t worry. We are molded in good time. Every thing in life truly is just how it is meant to be for each of us – however we might react to that statement! So, with that in mind, this blog is how it is meant to be for those of you whom it will reach, and it will have the necessary effect. I trust that you will find a gift within each posting. Please always question me should you need to.


Copy of roxyHello I am Roxanne Bannatyne. I am the founder of The School of Self-Empowerment, and the author of four books*. My blogs will cover a wide range of topics: you, relationships, intimacy (our sensuality and sexuality), the spiritual journey, yoga, Enlightenment, “co-creating”, and even a Complete Theory.

The essence of my life is Truth, and it is via my sites, blog and books that I would like to share how living in my complete Truth, across my life, has transformed my life. There are not many people I have met who live with such inner contentedness, balance and independence whilst at the same time being so deeply and joyfully connected to everything and one around them.

My first truthful admission to you will be as to why I am here, Tweeting, Blogging, FaceBooking, and networking. I am 53, and have always been perfectly happy living an almost hermit-like, low-tech, life! There is, however, a ‘product’ to be sold. It was not my intention to create this product. It is the first of those books mentioned. I already know and live by everything contained in my books, but others do not. Lives will be transformed by the contents which were obviously not just meant for me. Like all big spiritual writers, I am not the original “author” of Truths, but my insights have enabled me to make them relevant in a way (and with an energy) which makes sense to the modern beings we are – as we confront the problems and issues that exist in our very modern lives, and search for answers.

As I’ve stated elsewhere, I am a Bhakti Yogini – and that means that I am here ‘to serve’. I have evolved past having needs. I now just have desires to do that serving well. I long to help make every individual a more deeply happy, peaceful and lovingly productive being; this would obviously impact upon the world . If you are not the happiest self you could be, and if you don’t know how to fix your whole life (those relationships you have with partner, parent, child, friend and colleague) then please read my book, and then pass it on. Let’s change us, and then change the world. We are meant to be joyful, loved and loving. As such we are strong and oh-so-capable!

For a few excellent reviews of my Self-Help book Opening Secret Boxes , please visit:

* Further information, about me or my books may be obtained from my website: Only the 1st is in print, almost ready for full launching, whilst the other 3 move in that direction; as such my writings are copy-righted.

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